A journey to San Francisco to become no less than Me. (BLOG REBOOT: Former site of Hairy Legs.)

I just felt like, for once, taking a day out of focusing on transition and writing down an interesting series of thoughts I had this morning.  One can get burnt out looking at life through just one set of glasses, or focusing on just one subject all the time.  It’s time to move away from that for a day and have a look at something that I haven’t thought about in years: The Bible!

This is a worldly meditation on a single passage from Revelations that reveals the more human foibles written into the biblical depiction of a God that religion has long attributed to being all-perfect.  This study very much reveals the changes on my worldview that have happened even just over the past few days, and they have nothing to do with being more cynical, so read on for a secularly uplifting analyzation!  Without further ado:

Flawed God- The Human Side of an “Omnipotent” Being

Just now I went for a glass of water and when I went to drink it, I realized I hadn’t let the water run cold, and took a gulp of lukewarm water. I nearly spewed it all over the kitchen, and immediately an old scripture came to mind.

From the book of Revelations, Chapter Three:

v. 15 I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.

v. 16 So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

I’ve spent a lot of time avoiding things of a biblical nature because of the negative associations with the religious repression of my childhood, but for some reason, this passage has always held a sort of fascination for me (not to mention all the other mindfuckery in Revelations!), and I realized why.

John’s interpretation of God’s relationship with people charactarizes God as having a very human, foibled, almost romantic connection with humans. It’s fascinating because it reveals a way of thinking that is very primal and goes back literally thousands of years!
There are two behaviours we see in people we went that create compelling attraction.

One, the more straightforward of the two, is a lustful passion (or “heat”). We love being loved, doted upon, raved about! That’s no secret. God has long been characterized as being absolutely ADDICTED to praise! In one way, an all-powerful being could be seen as deserving of that kind of attention, but it’s a very human, prideful reaction to demand it.

The other is the Forbidden Fruit- the draw of that which we cannot have, (or “cold). It’s no secret that missionaries, “men of God” or what have you, feel the “call” towards more challenging converts, such as those in a faraway land, “sinners” trapped in a terrible life of drugs and crime, etc. These are apparently the people God has a real passion for- the otherwise “unreachable”. I think we all remember that verse from the old Testament (I can’t be arsed to look it up): “I AM A JEALOUS GOD”. Even he admits to it! This is the more fascinating of the two attractors to study, because it’s something I’ve noticed not only in many many people, but myself- It truly lights the flames of my passion when I have a fixation with someone who has outright denied me or otherwise is out of my reach. The draw of that which we cannot have, against all logic, is one of the most compelling forces in attraction.

Finally, an analyzation of the “lukewarm”, in love and in religion: the fairweather churchgoer. This is the person who was raised in the church and doesn’t necessarily believe one way or the other, but is afraid of the potential threat of eternal damnation and continues to go, not out of passion, but as a sort of chore to keep on the right side of the afterlife- OR attend church as a sort of status symbol, because everyone else is doing it, whatever. It amazes me how many people are like this, and don’t realize how much God supposedly is turned off by this kind of behaviour- if you don’t truly love God, if you’re just there to save your ass or look good, you’re not doing yourself any favors. God wants nothing to do with you if he’s just a free ride to Heaven for you… ATTENTION: YOU’RE THE ONES GOD IS TALKING ABOUT SPEWING OUT OF HIS MOUTH. If God truly exists, I don’t think he wants to be seen as a meal ticket. It truly goes to show how humanly God was characterized to be, because I think that’s a way of thought that many people can agree with.

In love, these are the most repulsive people to me as well. If you’re just with me because “there’s no other options,” or “it’s better than nothing,” or simply because you think I’m kinda cute but you don’t really have any deep feelings, or God forbid, to leach off of me and take me as a free ride, I’ve got news for you. I want nothing to do with you. If you’re not absolutely in love with me, if you don’t want to fuck my brains out, if you aren’t choked up even a little by the possibility of a life without me, then don’t waste my time! There are so many people in this world who I could truly fall in love with, but if they aren’t willing to jump with me, then let me clue you in. I’ve got too much to do with my life to waste my love and energy on a lackluster relationship. I’d rather do without and have the time to work on my art, or travel, or just see and do the infinite number of incredible things in this world on my own.

I don’t let things into my life anymore that aren’t absolutely mind shatteringly amazing. The world has so much in it, there are more things to do in this life than I have seconds to spend on them. If our love can promise to be one of those fireworks lighting up my sky, then I will let you in. If all you’ve got for me is a lighter, move along and give it to someone who is looking for smaller things. I’m not desperate for love. I am desperate to experience life to the fullest.

Sometimes, you just don’t realize how similar you are to God.

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